This is war

I live in a neighborhood where everyone takes pretty good care of their lawn - and I like to think they think the same of my yard. Yeah, we've got a couple guys with the fancy auto sprinklers and their yards are neon green all summer long. Not me. I'm a bit old fashioned when it comes to watering in particular and lawn care in general. I'm not one of those wacky reel mower guys - I like a nice internal combustion engine - but I kinda like hauling the hoses around the yard. It's therapeutic watching that pulsing sprinkler do its magic dance that I choreographed by adjusting those little silver pins.

But I think I'm up against it this year. I've been invaded by pests! I've got these unsightly yellow spots scattered across the yard - and in particular the front yard for all to see. This simply won't do. The shame of it makes me leave the house before dawn so I don't have to face my neighbors derisive laughs. So, through rigourous investigation - and a quick question to one of the auto sprinkler guys - I've determined that I've got "lawn pests." Off to the lawn and garden store I go and buy a big ass bag of insecticide. I've only got a modest "city lot" so I think I purchased enough to do the whole block. But in this case I figure more is better. One must have reinforcements when one goes into battle, yes? I've got the 101st Airborne in reserve - figurativley speaking. I will win this battle and I will win this war and I will have the respect of my neighbors once again. Just don't let you kids play in my yard for a few months.....